Friday, February 11, 2011

CSI (CAKE Scene Investigators)

I know I know.  I should have written sooner and trust me dear readers I do feel bad but sometimes life gets in the way.  I am here now though and since you have all waited so patiently for the next installment of A Day in the Life.  To apologize for not posting sooner, I will forego torturing my relatives and friends and give you a story about me.  Yes, a goof of my own.  Hope you laugh at me as much as I did.

CSI (CAKE Scene Investigators)

During its first 4 seasons, my favorite show was CSI.  This was before Miami (maybe Miami had one season) and New York.  It was just Grissom and his team doing what they did best.  Solving murders in an hour that would take a real team of Forensic Scientists weeks or years but I digress.

Another fact about me that some may or may not know, I absolutely LOVE Red Velvet cake.  Have you ever looked at the recipe for it though?  The recipe takes about 2 hours to prepare, not including baking time if you make it from scratch. I’m not even sure that includes the homemade Cream Cheese icing but man is it worth it.  (Pause for drooling)  You have no idea how excited I was to walk into a grocery store one day and discover Red Velvet Cake mix.  It was like a sign from heaven and I swear the fluorescent lights of the grocery store all faded except the one over that box.  I bought the cake mix and was in for another surprise when I got home.  There was a marathon of CSI on one of the TV channels.  Could the day get any better?

I get into some comfortable clothes (White T-shirt and jeans), turn the TV up so I can hear it in the kitchen, and start to read the instructions on the cake box which are easy enough.  Take some water, oil, the mix, and eggs and blend them together with a mixer.  Yay,10 minute prep time.  I do not own one of those fancy mixers with the bowl where you can just toss your ingredients in and let it go.  All I own is a simple hand mixer but it works so I’m not complaining.  I wait for a commercial and commence with the beating and blending.  I think the box said to mix for 5 minutes but can’t remember.

As I am mixing, I suddenly notice the cord from my hand mixer has fallen into the bowl.  (I am left handed and have the classic left hander hook) Oops!  I pick it up, wipe it off with my hand, put the excess batter in the bowl and since I am at home, just clean my hand with my T-shirt. Not sanitary but hey, it’s not a restaurant and I am the only one eating the cake.  My cake, my germs.  I keep mixing and something hits my sock.  I look down to discover a bright red splotch on my toe.  Confused, I look up to discover the cord had fallen into the mixer again and as I moved, the cord corrected itself but of course, batter was all over the cord and that is what caused the splatter.  By this time, my mind finally registered the fact that the batter was red…RED, oh heavens. 

I looked at the counter and the batter from the cord had not only dripped on my sock, but the counter, there was a red streak from the dishwasher to the floor, and of course, the floor itself, which I had stepped in by now.  I then remembered how I cleaned the batter.  My white T-shirt was covered in red and I looked like one of the suspects on the TV in the next room.  I was half expecting the Police to come knocking on my door for no reason and discover me in red stained clothes holding a lethal mixer.  You know, I lost interest in the show shortly afterwards.  Wonder why?


  1. OMG! I am giggling like a mad woman at work and hoping no one will look at me strange! I can just SEE this happening!

  2. I have tears in my eyes right now, Heather. True stories are the FUNNIEST stories. You really need to invest in that Tupperware bowl that has a lid on it with a hole in the middle just for mixing! I would hate that you no longer make Red Velvet cakes because of this. Ok my laughs have subsided, but I still have a smile on my face :)